One litter tears

Watched again the last episode of it, which teached me alot, seeing the one we love suffer and we can do nothing to help her, it cause me litter tears again. That really remind me what am i now. I cant do anything i so small what i want is still far from now. The world is not that easy, I also want to live happily but i got too many burden to carry, why i cant think like other, simply and happy. Why i must think for other not myself? Why?

What should I do with my life?

There's not only sweet sweet love during young, because now sweet later suffer.
If that day i dint decide it, i am sure my future will cause a big problem to me and to her.


To preserve a man alive in the midst of so many chances and hostilities, is as great a miracle as to create him. ~Jeremy Taylor

A new day

Today i will go and meet a cilent at pavilion, Dont know since when i starting to learn and earn money, Last time i am still like a young master, need money ask from dad and mum, but now i dont like to do that. Still remember the day when i saw my mum eating with us, she dont want to eat so much because she know that the restaurant is expensive, she save for us. BUt we keep using the money without thinking worth or not.

Dad work so hard to get money, I blame him why you earn so many money but come back with less, used to take care other family also? What we need, we want, have to think and think and think, scare later used up the money no need buy other more important one. Each family have it problem same to i.

Hweh I am sad and hurt, You know? From the second i decided to say goodbye to you, i am so so so unwanted, but i have to. You such a nice girl but i am not good enough for you, I choose a path that is hard to go, i have to take up the whole family, is very heavy.

There's no one i can talk to. Hweh, there's no win win situation in such a big deal, win win mean each get benefit from each other, but for me only one winner, which i give all mine to you and let you win. I am the people like that, Stupid me.

Hweh i miss you, lucky you dint follow or view my blog, cause this is the only place i can talk to you without letting you know. I miss you so much.

Half belong to You (H)

Today is a day to be remember.
I finally get my RM1000 from my hard work.
I take over my father insurance empire.
And this is my first time selling.
Is hard but good to remember.

Is good to see you happy.
I will save up 500 for you, I dont care you know or not, or remember, i will save money for you, give half of what i have to you. After i have more and more 1k, i going to see a lawyer to share half for you, that what i can do for you, cause i know future is not clear and for you future is a scary thing, you always think negative and bad, but i only can help u with this.

ONly leave you then i can fulfill what i want, I want to work more and more hard to have a better life, i know if i take too much time to take care you my time will gone, i know you want people love, care, but you have to learn independent and be strong. Be careful when hang out, watch the environment carefully, Even i cant be your boy friend anymore but i will do whatever to help and guide you, i dont mind to be a bad guy if u can learn something on it.

I miss you, If i am rich and strong then how good, i dont have to work and can always stay with you without worrying about other thing, go visit with you, do anything with you... I wont be sad or scary in front of you, I rather suffer myself but bring you happiness. Haixz... you also wont understand what i feel de la. Is a hard thing for a man to see her woman living in poor and sad situation, plus the woman dont love himself somemore.

I miss you so much, You are the one who bring me out from dark, but also the one who bring me in again. I will work more and more hard to get a better life for you in the future. Is good for you and your new love to live in.

I keep all my love to you deep inside my heart.

I miss you and I Love you....


"Is good to do best thing to other without letting they know, even they misunderstanding you. Think and do for other. " From Obama president of USA.....

What i feel on...

My journal is what i feel on....
Feel on what?
Lolz... Tml 2pm class....
So freezzy to work la.

Keeping the real feeling deep inside the heart, do not waste what you did, she will never know why you did so.

I am crazy but it is true, the reality is cruel, woke up from a good dream...
I hope to stay in the dream forever with you, but the real world are not allowed.
If one day i can walk with you again that mean i success to achieve what i want. That the only time i can give you all i want to give you, money, time, love, everything.

Is that possible?